Jesus (in glory) descends on the Senate,
commanding John Roberts, “SIT down!
You are not worthy of judging my Donnie.
Nor are the rest of you clowns!”
While seraphim gambol, blowing their cornets
and angels sing Hallejuellas,
Jesus seizes the Dems by their horns
saying, “I am returning to rule ya!
“No more abortion, to hell with gay rights,
women get barefoot and pregnant.
And don’t even mention ‘one man one vote’.
The notion, to me, is repugnant.
“You can forget the ungodly idea
of freely electing your leaders.
Read my lips! ‘KINGDOM of Heaven.’
Democracy’s not for believers.
“And what makes you think ‘all men are equal’?
Totally stupid idea!
Of course I play favorites. (Hint: NOT the Jews).
Have you paid no attention all of these years?
“I’m back, I’m proud, I’m White, I’m loud,
I speak English, NOT Aramaic.
Whoever suggests I do otherwise,
I herewith condemn to Passaic
“or Lodi or somewhere in Jersey
with devils and Kushners and Christie.
Ah, happy days then . . . the Trenton State Pen . . .
It makes me tearful and misty.
“I HAVE RETURNED.
I REIGN SUPREME.
I CALL THE SHOTS.
(Ya know what I mean?)
“Donnie and Jesus.
Jesus and Donnie.
Who’s conning who?
Sing, ‘Hey, nonny-nonny!’”