№ 882: Deep, Deep, DEEP Red State Plan

IF WISHES WERE HORSES (June 18) —

The founding fathers never did say

one-man-one-vote is the answer.

They'd say, were they with us today,

“Democracy's proved a disaster.”

The rich and well-born, Hamilton swore

contrary to Lin-Manuel Miranda,

are best equipped to sing the score,

counterpointing Jefferson's vox pop propaganda.

Even Red Thom was not really lefty.

He never said, “Property's theft.” He

never envisioned expanding the franchise.

All of the founders thought that unwise.

People — the mobs, the ignorant slobs —

haven't a clue. (AND they're needy!)

Also they're poor and reek of manure.

They vote . . . things get exceedingly seedy.

There are so many of them.

Masses and masses.

Brown, black, yellow, red. 

(Some even WHITE!)

Thick as molasses.

Still conquer we will with shrill Donnie our shill,

until we're a true Christian Nation.

Then, with Pence in his place we will say grace,

and send Donnie away on a dis-served “vacation”.

№ 881: Question ALL Things

TIME OUT OF MIND (June 17) —

Is Bob Dylan smarter than was Aristotle,

who got nearly everything wrong?

In addition to which he did not win a Nobel

and, as you know, never wrote songs

defining his time and explaining all things

in words college sophomores could grasp

as they sang along “Bob-ing” their heads,

fantastically stoned on really great grass.

Wisdom and knowledge are never complete.

They evolve over time.

Today's genius is tomorrow's fool

if there's a shift in the paradigm.

Today, we “think” Dylan not Plato or Socrates,

content to follow mere mediocrities.

№ 880: Tulsa Or Bust

Trump’s Rally Could Be a ‘Perfect Storm’ for the Virus, Tulsa Officials Fear (Paywall)

President Trump will hold his first campaign rally in months on Saturday in Oklahoma, where infections are rising, and officials there are pleading with him to cancel or hold it outdoors.

DEAD END, OK (June 16) —

No masks for us.

We will not discuss it.

If God calls us home,

we will not be alone.

As a matter of fact,
our bags are packed,
we're rarin' to go,

so on with the show.

We will not heed official condemnings.

We follow Donnie. You DO KNOW we're lemmings?
Only in heaven will we be content.
A rather incredible end for a rodent.

№ 879: Really?

EREWHON (June 15) —

What if it’s already over?

What if we’re already dead?

What if reality’s all an illusion

and never happened instead

of happening here, in the now,

wherever that happens to be,

what if, in fact, everything's fiction,

a make-believe story, not actuality?

What if all you thought ever happened

happened in somebody's head?

What if you are a throwaway character

in a short story composed for a course 

taught by an alcoholic failed writer

(whose unfaithful spouse just filed for divorce)

at a for-profit college named for Betsy DeVos?

What if, in a world falling to tatters,

those were facts? Would it change matters

if the foregoing was what was real

and not Donnie's foul and floundering “deal”?

№. 878.1: EXTRA! Bonfire Of Don's Vanity

Trump to reportedly take legal action to block John Bolton's tell-all book

• ABC News says Trump expected to file suit seeking injunction

• The Room Where It Happened due for publication next week

Bolton’s lawyer, Chuck Cooper, wrote in the Wall Street Journal last week of “a transparent attempt to use national security as a pretext to censor Mr Bolton, in violation of his constitutional right to speak on matters of the utmost public import.

“This attempt will not succeed, and Mr Bolton’s book will be published [on] 23 June.”

His predecessor as national security adviser, HR McMaster, has a book due out in September.

Trump books have become big business. On Sunday night, the Daily Beast reported that the president’s niece, Mary Trump, will publish one in August. It is expected to contain revelations about Trump family relationships and its tax affairs.

WHITE HOUSE BOOK BURNING ROOM (June 15) —

All these new books telling the truth

which, in consequence, are “anti-Trump”

will have, I expect, zero effect

for, alas and alack, the unhappy fact

is Donnie's supporters don't read

anything much, saving their Bible,

though some may, on occasion,

attempt to read an Ayn Randy screed.

These intellectu-fools — no disrespect! —

suffer from Dunning-Kruger effect.

№ 878: GOP Platform 2020 — secret at 'em dumb

DEEPEST GOP (June 14) —

What is the point of letting THEM vote

if THEY won't vote the right way.

Blah, blah, blah, “consent of the governed”,

democracy, in its place, is . . . okay.

We, THE ELITE, determine THAT place

which, prima facie, of course, ignores race

IF you sign on with our NEW GOP

and swear you favor theocracy,

marriage between a man and his wife,

(who must do what she’s told on pain of her life),

negative taxes to give businesses cash

(to bail them out when they cause a crash),

deregulating all business activity,

plus privatizing “Social Security”.

(Whereas, “personal hygiene” is a Federal affair,

abortion and “sex choice” fall under our care.)

Unions are, from now on, forbidden.

Except for collecting dues.

Which shall be given to us to assure

that these dues are wisely used.

In education, we'll protect our young ones

by arming their teachers with pistols and guns,

emphasizing the King James Version

(and taxing parents resisting conversion),

excising all mention of Darwin-like weirdos,

and renaming schools for Confederate heroes.

These are a few of the things we stand for.

We can check FOX and add a few more.

Our platform is in FOX's capable hands.

We await Rupert Murdoch's latest commands.