[Email subscribers: go to blog to hear instrumental.]
(with apologies to Daniel E. Kelley and Dr. Brewster M. Higley)
This chere's a “poem”
'bout the Y-chromosome
that makes all things “female” fair prey.
To us it's just flirt.
(My God! That's a tight skirt!
What-you-mean, take my hand away?)
Why? Y-chromosome!
Allow me your fears to allay.
I never heard
your discouraging word.
I thought we agreed that we “play”.
I've nothing but praise
for those goodoledaze
when a fella could do what he likes.
When you stupid sluts
kept your fat yaps shut
and now you're dumb dykes wearing mikes.
Y-, Y-chromosome.
Back when — whether bi-, straight or gay —
if you were a famous
and rich ignoramus,
no one dared to get in your way.