No. CXIV.II: EXTRA! Close enough?

USA Today: Anthony Scaramucci to be White House communications director

Excyclopædia Britannica: Scaramouche, Italian Scaramuccia, stock character of the Italian theatrical form known as the commedia dell’arte; an unscrupulous and unreliable servant. His affinity for intrigue often landed him in difficult situations, yet he always managed to extricate himself, usually leaving an innocent bystander as his victim. [Emphasis added.]

Scarmouche? Scarmucci?

He is not Steve Doocy.

He's a different fact-free loosey-goosey.

No. CXIV.I: EXTRA! Lock him up, lock him up!

The American Conservative: Trump’s Self-Pardon? Seriously?

USA Today: Trump freaked out on Christie because of cellphone germs?

Trump's pardoning “selfie”? A fraught decision.
Better to make Mar a Lago a prison.

No need to borrow Chris Christie's phone.

Donnie could tweet @DT @home.

No. CXIV: Health Insurance (the GOP view)

What IS the bother? Why all this FUSS?

The uninsured do not vote for us!

They are not our concern. Why should we cry?

It is so much simpler to just watch them die.

No. CXIII.I: EXTRA! Recording Sessions?

WSJ: Sessions Plans to Remain in Post After Rebuke by Trump (Paywall)
U.S. Attorney General Jeff Sessions said he plans to remain as attorney general after President Trump said he was disappointed that he recused himself from matters related to the Russia probe.  

Did Donald just suggest that Jeff Sessions

should follow his ancestors' bid for secession?

Previously, had this duo agreed

if they disagreed, Jeff would secede,

leave DC clamor, Trump golden glamour,

abandon grammar and go back to 'Bama

to yammer and stammer alone in camera.

Oh, if only, “I had a hammer...”

No. CXIII: RNC GOP Senate Fix

The RNC decrees new GOP shoes

to prevent even the teensyest bruise,

from repeatedly shooting ourselves in the feet

with each self-inflicted Senate defeat.

The uppers, of course, will be U.S. Steel
providing protection from toe to heel.

(Okay, okay! Rounds may ricochet.

We'll get to that some other day.)

No. CXII.I: EXTRA! The Law Of The Living (?) Dead

WaPo: Trump challenges senators to resurrect Obamcare repeal effort: ‘We’re close’ (Paywall)

Hoping to avoid a humiliating political defeat, President Trump on Wednesday demanded that Republican senators resume their efforts to approve a plan to repeal and replace the Affordable Care Act, insisting that lawmakers are “very close.”

it's never here

it's never there

it's never dead

it's Trump's Zombiecare

No. CXII: GOP Repeal And Replace (or how to fail spin)

Good thing — the fail of repeal and replace?

No one can say it was “all about race”.

So, you Lib-er-als, “There! IN. YOUR. FACE!”

Though in GOP we deny evolution,

survival of fittest (us!) is our solution.

Everyone else? Genetic pollution.

Long story short: this is all about us.

Nothing else here we need to discuss.

Welcome aboard. (There's the back of the bus.)

No. CXI: McConnell-Ryan Healthcare

The thinking behind barring the poor

from having healthcare insurance:

they don't vote for us,

so let 'em fuss.

Plus it's too hard to keep 'em from votin',

it's much more efficient to kill 'em.

No. CX: Trump 101

Donald's “secret” ingredient?

Doing whatever's expedient.

Plus he's unable to recognize

a difference between the truth and his lies.

(It worked in his businesses — AND with his wives!?)