№ 777: Something To Sneeze At

ISOLATION WARD (January 23)

Will coronavirus quickly expire us

before Donnie dear does us in?

Before rising oceans inundate coastlines,

rendering subways places you swim in?

Before an asteroid (or maybe a comet)

brings us to “Game Over! TILT!”?

Before business leaders finally fess up
after so many decades of denying guilt?

If this is an emergency, then with some urgency

we should do something to stop it.

Which, in due course, we will try to do —

once we determine how we can profit.

№ 776: A Max Senate Comedy

LIGHT'S OUT (January 22)

The Senate assures us they’re fair and unbiased,

(as you’d expect for a body so pious),

sitting in judgment of this arrogant crook

at whom the House could have thrown more than one book.

Given his guilt is proudly admitted,

it should take no time to see him acquitted,

even if, push comes to shove,

Dems can convince him to try on the glove.

№ 775: An American Conservative Manifesto

NEVERNEVERLAND (January 22)

Ignorance and superstition,

is what we need more of today.

Even that may not be sufficient

to make the twentieth century just go away.

“Mohammed” Murdoch (PBUH) foxily

co-opted the label and reset the table

of public discourse, insisting “facts”

are Liberal constructs, mere artifacts.

Starting with TR and Taft and Wilson

(though Woody ALL RIGHT on race),

the century got off to a god-awful start,

the lower orders forgetting their place.

Taxes on income! Workers with “rights”!

Undesirables mass immigration!

Child labor laws and women voting

began the decline of the nation.

We must return to the founders' principles

if we wish to be number one:

shoot first and ask questions later,

the only good Injun's a dead 'un,
conquer we must when our cause it is just,
and learn to love what should disgust.
You can commit most any sin . . .
only thing matters is whether you win.

№ 774: Sanders Of Time

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BERNIEWORLD (January 20)

(with apologies to Alexander Borodin, Robert Wright, and George Forrest)

So I'm old
let's be clear
I'm the candidate Trump must fear, you know
So I'm old, it's Bernie Sanders' time, 
good old Bernie Sanders' time, you know

I am wise
as you know, I constantly tell you so
I am wise,
I am old Bernie Sanders-wise
so old Bernie Sanders-wise, it's so

Women run,
but they can't
beat Donald Trump, I can
Sanders can
Only Sanders can

№ 773: Coogan's Bluff, October 3, 1951*

A SIMPLER TIME (January 19)

Did Branca's pitch and Thompson's home run
change anything in 1951?

In Manhattan 
there were children conceived
as part of the celebration.
Whereas, in Brooklyn 
others got started,
in part, as consolation.

“There’s a divinity that shapes our ends,

rough-hew them how we will. . .”

“Best-laid schemes. . .gang aft agley. . .”

and that will continue until

we can produce cast iron cinches.

But until then, it's a game of inches.

(Having said that, I'll end this rhyme,
noting your “luck” is better if you steal the sign.)

—————————
*Shot Heard 'Round the World