Friday, July 13, 2018

№ 377.1: EXTRA! Eat It!

Guardian: Woodchucks join the resistance and eat Paul Ryan's car
The Republican House speaker has revealed that a family of hungry rodents has put his car out of commission


Rodents eat SUVs? Really! Do tell!
Attracted, were they, by similar smell
of hypocritical, Ayn Randy, opportunist Paul Ryan?
Tho' we will miss him, we're glad he's retirin'.
His successor, hows'wver, will be a worse'n
more closely aligned with that president person,
more honestly crooked and less of a schnook,
a straight-forward, in-your-face, down-to-earth crook
without semblance of reverence for “Good” (or any!) book.
Perhaps child-molester enabler Jim Jordan?
Who, far as we know, is down with Trump's whoredom.
A Tea Party, Trump-buddy avatar,
who, if he stays our of jail, is bound to go far.
(If he's approved by Putin, the Tsar.)

№ 377: Vehemently In Favor

Medium: “May We Live Long and Die Out”
A global movement to extinguish the human race
. . .VHEMT (pronounced “vehement”) for short — a worldwide crusade of at least 9,000 people who have voluntarily decided not to have children. The idea behind VHEMT is that Homo sapiens have caused so much damage to the planet already that the only thing that can restore the balance is for humanity to go extinct, and the only humane way to do that is by refusing to procreate.

. . .The ideal world population is somewhere between 1.5 billion to 2 billion, according to a study published by three Stanford ecologists in 1994.


Let us ponder the question, putting it thus:
Would the world be better without all of us?
Of course, were a major source of pollution.
Our extinction might offer a partial solution.
But if we were fewer and not quite so dense
might not that be enough recompense
for the messes forever we're making and hence
some could live on if two-thirds were gone?
That does make some sense.
However, if history is something to go on. . .

AND what of our Ponzi economy
which works when everything's growing?
Fewer consumers mean few workers,
fewer jobs. (And fewer shirkers.)
Nice idea, though, this VHEMT.
Pity it comes with shoes of cement.
Presuming, as do all notions human,
what we do makes a diff and also assuming
we can duct tape damages caused
and do what we do with nary a pause,
ignoring that we are but Nature's phlegm,
’til she clears her throat with a mighty, “Ahem!”,
restoring the world without MEN (or WOMEN), Amen!

See also: 
Nautilus: Is Fixing the Climate Incompatible with American Ideals?
Welcome to the Anthropocene. This greeting is belated, of course. We have all been here the whole 
of our lives, without knowing it for most of our days. The Anthropocene is a span of geological and evolutionary time (technically, an epoch) during which humans have had an outsized role in transforming the natural world, most of that time without knowledge and awareness of the consequences of their actions. Those who use the term argue about when the epoch begins. Does it start with the Industrial Revolution, late in the 18th century, hastening around 1850? Or does it make sense to push the date back in time to the first appearances of agriculture in scattered populations, as much as 10,000 years before the present, or even earlier?

Thursday, July 12, 2018

№ 376: Just Dessert?

Guardian: The big scoop: America's favorite ice-cream flavor, revealed
Not only are we in the middle of National Ice Cream Month but it is National Ice Cream Day on Sunday. This extensive celebration of frozen cream comes to us thanks to President Ronald Reagan (clearly a puppet of big ice-cream) who signed these observances into public law in 1984.  













Choc-o-late? Really?
Then vanilla and butter pecan?
I have to ask, “What in hell's going on?”
Cookies n créme, mint chocolate chip?
Chocolate chip cookie dough?
Strawberry and pistachio?
I mean! Get a grip!

Have armies of Putin's Facebook trolls
padded voting rolls, skewing these polls?
Are responders on Moscow's payroll?
I can not accept this.
I think it's a plot.
When it comes to ice-cream,
I like coffee. A lot!

Of course, the ignorant may disagree
and favor a flavor I do not savor.
There is no explaining human behavior.

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

№ 375: Burke's Slaw (it depends on how you slice it)

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. — Edmund Burke

Mr. Burke? Sir, with all due respect,
you are ignoring cause and effect.
What we do (or we neglect)
has little effect in retrospect.
Wherever, whenever man is detected,
surely then evil must be expected.

And, then, it must be understood,
what you say is evil may be my good.

In conclusion:
I've no wish to be rude in this.
but, Burke, you are platitudinous.

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

№ 374: A Shakespearean Mystery

Why,
do you suppose
Shakespeare did not 
compose only prose?
Did he think versing
would make understood
the need for diversity
whilst showing he could
make a good living
sans university?
Or was he, 
semi-tutored but plucky,
a Warwickshire lad who got lucky?

Monday, July 9, 2018

№ 373: Good News!

To be (or not to be)
is not the question.
Considering BEING 
(or NOT BEING)
gets you, at best, indigestion.


We are, for better (or worse),
stuck here in this universe 
that does not —
and CAN not — 
know we are here.
(And if it could,
it would not care.)
The notion there is no all-seeing being
some find depressing, To me it's freeing.

Sunday, July 8, 2018

The Week In Rearview (July 8, 2018)

Sunday, July 1, 2018
№ 367.2 EXTRA! “Work Out” Or Wipe Out
Kim and I made a deal,
as I've said before.
Kim and I made a deal.
We pinky swore.
MORE

Monday, July 2, 2018
№ 368: To Bee Or Knot
When a foraging bee
finds blooming flowers,
MORE

№ 368.1: EXTRA! To Flip Or Not Flip (is there a question?)
       When I said “take a bullet”
        I was thinking Nerf gun.
        MORE

Tuesday, July 3, 2018
 № 369: Religious Revival
        If your soul you need to renew
        MORE

Wednesday, July 4, 2018
№ 370: Our Ancestors
        . . .the best, in the end, win
        MORE

№ 370.1: EXTRA! Invasion Of Piracy
        I can invade Venezuela
        MORE

Thursday, July 5, 2018
№ 371: Critical Mass?
        Is God one of the guys?
         MORE

Friday, July 6, 2018
№ 372: The Godlies
        True believers, who think they're anointed
         MORE

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