Showing posts with label Shakespeare. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Shakespeare. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 29, 2019

№ 605: The Fault By Default

Scientists say surge of radiation led to lightning causing forest fires, making adaptation vital

It was the evolutionary leap that defined the species: while other apes ambled around on all fours, the ancestors of humans rose up on two legs and, from that lofty position, went on to conquer the world.

The benefits of standing tall in the African savannah are broadly nailed down, but what prompted our distant forebears to walk upright is far from clear. Now, in a radical proposal, US scientists point to a cosmic intervention: protohumans had a helping hand from a flurry of exploding stars, they say.

REGRETTABLY, May 28

It is not our fault: the fact that we're plods.
Nor was this caused by one of the Gods. 
Not Yahweh or Juno, not Venus or Mars.
The fault, dear Brutus, IS in our stars.
(I said all along, Shakespeare was wrong!)

Wednesday, May 8, 2019

№. 590: A Trumphumphant Reverie

(adapted from Richard III, Act V, Scene 3 with apologies to W. Shakespeare, Kit Marlowe, Oxford, Darby, Elizabeth I and all the other usual suspects.)

BOSWORTH FIELD, May 7

Give me another golf cart: bind up my bone spurs.
Have mercy, Mikey! — Soft! I did but dream.
O coward conscience, thou dost dare afflict me?
My thumbs turneth blue tweeting past midnight
While Coke spittle drips from my snarl purse-ed lip.
What? Do I fear? Congress? Those I can't buy?
Donald loves Donald; that is, I am I.
Is there a scoundrel here? No? Yes? Not I!
Then fly. To Mar A Lago. Play golf. Oh, I am sly!
Am I unhinged, Mac burger binged? What? Myself! I?
True fact! I love myself. Wherefore? Well, I'm that kinda guy
That I to myself do for myself
Tho' had I conscience I could hate myself
For hateful deeds committed by myself!
And think me a villain: yet I lie. I am not.
A stable genius, I speak truth. I do not flatter.
A conscience might have a thousand several tongues,
And every tongue bring a several tale,
And every tale condemn me for a villain.
Perjury! Perjury! That canst be thee.
Lookst thou to thy ratings on FOX TV;
Thou art without sin. Or so says Sean Hannity.
Did not Billy Barr tell the Senate “NOT guilty!”
How could I despair? All good creatures love me.
I do not foresee how they could shove me
out of the White House on the street by myself
replaced by Pence or somebody less than myself.
Methinks the Dems still believe I will topple.
They are unaware I don't follow estoppel.*
No one canst ever take vengeance on Donald.

[updated 5/8/2019 11:04 a.m.]
_______________
*a rule of evidence whereby a person is barred from denying the truth of a fact that has already been settled

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

№ 374: A Shakespearean Mystery

Why,
do you suppose
Shakespeare did not 
compose only prose?
Did he think versing
would make understood
the need for diversity
whilst showing he could
make a good living
sans university?
Or was he, 
semi-tutored but plucky,
a Warwickshire lad who got lucky?

Monday, May 21, 2018

№ 338: Speaking English Only?


Este miércoles se viralizó el video de un abogado estadounidense que arremetió contra empleados y clientes en un restaurante neoyorquino porque estos hablaban en español. El video publicado en Facebook alcanzó más de 6 millones de reproducciones.

El hombre, identificado como Aaron Schlossberg de 44 años, le gritó enfurecido al encargado del restaurante.


IF Anglo-Saxon invasions had never happened
would there be anywhere called Great Britain,
would Celtic* be the tongue Hamlet was writ in?
IF Godwinson had not defeated Hardrada
and not then been battle-killed by invader Guillaume, 
that French-speaking Norman bastard pretender 
whose God made him heir to Confessor's throne,
IF history had had a different twist
would this language we speak in even exist†?
_________________
*

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Tuesday, September 12, 2017

No. CLIII: What Fate Awaits Us

after these months —
which seem like years —
it is clear Trump
is playing at Lear
(Lear as in Shakespeare
not as in Norman)...
on the horizon
hurricanes storm in

will Trump magic
turn comedy tragic
with Ryan-McConnell
as Regan and Goneril
his crowd, Cordelia,
miss-iled by Korea —
good daughter, bad daughters,
Trump, us — all slaughtered

the curtain descends
la commedia ends...
makes fatal sense
to President Pence —
aglow in the dark,
the remnant's monarch