№ 787.1: EXTRA! I Have Seen The Future (it's for jerks)

THE WEEK

Trump officially opens formerly protected Utah national monuments for business
The Interior Department released final plans Thursday for two national monuments in Utah that President Trump moved to radically shrink two years ago. Under the final plans, about 2 million acres that were once part of Bears Ears and Grand Staircase-Escalante national monuments would be open to mineral extraction and ranching. Public lands advocates, Native American groups, and conservationists whose lawsuits to prevent the downsizing of the national monuments are still being litigated in court, called foul.

TOMORROWLAND (February 7)

Who will own all the garbage

when that’s all that’s left of the world?

The swirl of plastics and carcasses

where blue-green oceans once whirled?

The deserted sun-blasted inland

now remarkably close to the coast?

The poisonous air and brown waters

which will be supporting at most

hearty one-cell extremophiles

who find such conditions divine

and with Donald still POTUS

will anyone notice

the Koch Brothers’ name on the sign?

№ 488: How Democracy Could Be Made To Work (an Ayn Randy/Jim-Dandy/Koch Bros Ideal)

Do not try to tell me democracy works!

You like being governed by losers and jerks?

Said Jefferson 😇, “God” created men equal 😉.

In the beginning. We're in the sequel.

Which — no surprise — is appalling flawed. 

Presents for peasants! I mean, Good Lord!

S-l-o-o-o-o-w, low IQ beggars and debtors

who think they're better than us, their betters,

and, stubborn, refuse to yield to our will

which leaves us no option. Other than kill.

THAT sort of democracy would be an improvement.

As after a blockage is a bowel movement.

No. 289: Voting Slights And Immigrant Fights

This “poem” is brought to you by the Republican National Committee,

a wholly owned subsidiary of Koch Brothers Industries.

Voting isn't a right.

It's earned by birth. 
AND what you are worth.
(Maybe not this time
but soon for sure
we'll take the vote
from anyone poor.)

Also of import

is where you're from.

We will never allow

foreign-born scum

to ever again elect anyone
unwhite, unmale, unrich!

Honestly, really!

Why ditch

a system that's worked

for two centuries

that permits us to do

just as we please?

Bad enough

we had to let

Catholics, Jews

and other refuse

pour over our borders,

marry our daughters.

There are still those

we choose not

to live in close 
quarters with.

Men called Señor,
we will not endure.

We'll let in some Hindus.

You know the sort —

those people we need

to staff tech support?

Temp workers only,

not permanent hires,

who have to leave

when their visa expires.

There is a freeze

on all Chinese.

DO NOT ask whyfor!

(You know we're at war?

If not at this moment, 

then very soon.

Say, maybe, Thursday. 

Mid-afternoon?)

And you can bet

we'll make up some grounds

to exclude anyone 
from anywhere 
Muslims are found.

And lest they imagine they'll

slip through the cracks,

let me assure everyone

we need no new African Blacks.

Not that we're bigots,

not by any means,

but we have already

sufficient sports teams.

No. 283.1: EXTRA! Mr. Ryan's Nay-borhood

“We are extremely worried about the consequences of a trade war and are urging the White House to not advance with this plan,” AshLee Strong, a spokeswoman for House Speaker Paul D. Ryan (R-Wis.), said in a statement Monday.

— WaPo: Ryan splits with Trump on trade as GOP lawmakers move to block planned tariffs (Paywall)

Is this, at last, respite from despair?

Have Paul Ryan's balls reappeared?

Has he grown a new pair?

Will the limp wimp stand up to the bully?

OR

for rea$on$ the publi¢ ¢an't under$tand fully,

will Ryan retreat, du¢k ba¢k in hi$ $hell

and let Trump ¢ontinue pell-melling to hell?

What are hi$ in$tru¢tion$ from Brother$ Ko¢h?

Will he ¢ontinue to be a $i¢k joke?

Of course, whatever 

Donald says one day,

can be untweeted the next before noon.

Who really can say? 

We suggest staying tuned.

[updated 3/5/2018, 8:59 pm]

No. 271: A Koch Brothers Lament (And you think you've got problems?)

In the U.S. economy the question persists:

how many poor folk to permit exist

to provide our food, clean up our messes,

to do whatever we feel would distress us?

How to determine the number of plumbers,

servants, salesmen, drummers, newcomers

needed to keep things pleasant and easy 

doing work which makes us queasy?

Their numbers sufficient to keep things efficient

with wages below some low coefficient

enough (barely) to keep them assuaged

complacently placid so they'll not engage

in fights for their “rights” setting their sights

on toppling us, the elites, from the heights?

While we have to admit we love keeping them down,

our heads do lie uneasy wearing the crown.

No. 232.1 EXTRA! A Tax In Time (TCCDD News Analysis)

What's on the table?
Legislators of all party labels 

never see a distinction betwixt

putting on paper what they want to be

versus nasty reality.

They think, "We voted. Everything's fixed!"

Democrats blew Obamacare rollout.

They passed it and thought they were ready to go.

Though, without West Coast supertech bailout, 

it would have been instantly end of the show,

with no Justice John Roberts faking Chiefly

a reason to keep it alive. (However briefly.)

Is massive GOP tax overhaul  

speeding toward that same exact wall? 

DC, we may have a bit of a flaw.

Words hastily scribbled into the law

do not design tax filing forms,

1040 instructions or policy norms.

Who can possibly be in compliance

absent any IRS guidance?

Do not forget it will take time to be seen

if courts can tell what these words even mean.

And try to imagine the mother lode,

writing and testing all that computer code.

There is no time.

No, we don't have 'til mid-April deadline.

The hour is now. So, wow, we're in a jam.

Do Koch Brothers and others know how to program?