Showing posts with label Airbus. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Airbus. Show all posts

Monday, May 18, 2020

№ 858: Corona Conspiracy — the plane truth?

Comac C919 — Wikipedia
The Comac C919 is a narrow-body twinjet airliner developed by Chinese aerospace manufacturer Comac....Its first commercial deliveries are expected in 2021...It is intended to compete primarily with the Boeing 737 MAX and Airbus A320neo.

CONSPIRACY CENTRAL  (May 17) —
A FOX NEWS EXCLUSIVE!

C919 — Wikipedia. Nose cone virus — Harvard Health.
Co-VID? Co-MAC?
Gotta be one and the same!
Here @FOX we see plots, a lot!
This is NOT a conspiracy “theory”.
Clearly, Obama's DEEP STATE is to blame
for this China campaign to sell planes.
Increase Boeing's crashes, Airbus's collapse —
these wily Chinamen, these slanty-eyed chaps!
To dominate plane sales all ’round the world.
(To make men wear pigtails so we look like girls!)
We can't be too careful, we can never relax.
WHAT IF . . . they plant veggies in Donnie's snacks!
His meat intake decreased, his giant brain boggles.
He tries to walk, he waddles and wobbles.
Babbling garbled tweets through the night,
he says stupid stuff . . . oh, wait. That's right . . .
That's WHO HE IS. That's WHAT HE DOES.
That's why WE LOVE HIM. It is because
his discordant discourse makes us feel GREAT.
And when we feel great, we feel free to hate.
Anyone. Anywhere. Any time. THAT'S the plan.
To reclaim what it is to be an AMERICAN.
Free to believe whatever we choose.
Even la merde “dox” of FOX NEWS

Thursday, May 7, 2020

№ 851: The Skys Are Limited

The Big Park (Paywall)


An economy in lockdown requires far fewer planes and ships, forcing owners to figure out where to store them

Nowhere is the challenge more acute than in aviation. Reeling from travel bans, many airlines have grounded their entire fleets, while most others have cancelled the majority of flights. Collectively, they have dropped tens of millions of seats from their schedules every week . . .

Email subscribers click here.


(with apologies to Lionel Bart) 
  
BLUE SKIES FROWNING (May 6) — 
Who will buy my seven-three-sevens?
Who will save the air industry?
All these planes and nobody needs them
We can't give them away for free


With all the airlines grounded
'cuz everything's locked down,
Airbus and Boeing profits pounded,
their ships have run aground


No one needs a 320neo
then there's Boeing's cat-as-tro-phe
Airlines die when no one will fly them
There's nothing we can do,
plane makers' Waterloo,
because there's no one who will fly