№ 861: Why Not Neanderthals?

CONSIDER IT (May 20) —

Neanderthal Museum, Krapina, Croatia  
Photo by Nikola Solic/Reuters

Neanderthals. Were they so super stupid

that they were extincted by us
H. Saps. whose brains, a priori,
were better than theirs? End of the story.

Or were H. Neas. simply less vicious,

more peaceful, more gentle and thus

a breeze to dispatch for superior Saps.?

We do see ourselves as spectacular chaps

in that we can be totally brutal,

a species that deems fair play unfruitful,

whose unstated motto is something akin to:

Do what you have to in order to win.

This attitude, while crude, has its perks.

The first and foremost being it works.

№ 766: “Knees”-capped By H. Saps.

LONG AGO AND FAR AWAY (January 8)

Our Neanderthal cousins
were, perhaps, too adapted
to Europe's repeating ice ages.

They gathered. They hunted.
They spoke. They grunted.
They lived to old and ripe ages
of forty or fifty
which was pretty nifty, considering
what they had to contend with:
poor food, no housing,
lack of delousing
and rather few people who 
they could be friends with.

As much prey as predator,
they could not get credit or
depend on a “nanny” state.
When they were unable
to put food on their table, 
it was each other they ate.

They used tools and fire
and aspired to art
with paintings and etchings in caves.
We can not dismiss them
as primevalists —
they buried their dead
with respect in graves.

Then Saps. arrived.
“Knees” took a nosedive.
Their time had come to an end. With 
“Knee” genes surviving in Saps. DNA, 
we see Saps. tended to “blend” with 
their lower brow kin. With 
typical Saps. insouciance,
saying, “Okay, babe, 
how ’bout we ‘dance’?” 

Had “Knees” beat out Saps., 
you would see, perhaps, 
less emphasis now upon sex.
In a cold climate a species
restricts their breeding to the few days preceding
the season assuring sufficient nutrition
during gestation and post-parturition.

With once-a-year mating, “Knees” could never compete
against Saps. who would rather screw you than eat.