№ 485: A (no longer) Private Transaction

I must tell you fock

there's no law I brock.

Was Cohen (“The Flipper”)

that dealt with the stripper,

if something's illegal,

he takes the heat.

Nothing — heh, heh! — 

can get laid at MY feet.

(When I typed “feet”,

bone spurs were awocken.

It hurts real bad,

so I'm gonna sock 'em.)

As you may be aware

in my legal affairs

I'm always Punch*,
to my lawyer's Judy†.

That's just how it is —

the way I do biz.

I needs me my booty.
Just go ask Rudy.

___________
^*Punch. . .the chief figure in the Punch-and-Judy puppet show. Brutal, vindictive, and deceitful, he is usually at odds with authority. — Encyclopædia Britanica
†Judy. . .brutalized wife of the hunchbacked Punch. — Ibid.