№ 883: Gilt By Association (or like Vaterland like son and grandson)

EXPLAIN AWAY (June 21) —

There is nothing for breakfast that I find finer

than pancakes made by MY Aunt Jemima.

Abraham Lincoln. Like me, a Republican.

Not many people know that.

What with his seizing citizens’ property,

I figured him for a Democrat.

Big deal, ABRAHAM! You “freed” a few “slaves”.

’Sme made Juney-teenth famous.

’Slike like we whites got too no “Negros”

by listening to Andy and Amos.

My dad, Fred Trump, “liked” die Amerikadeutscher Volksbund

because he was fond of das Vaterland.

There is, however, NO PROOF WHATSOEVER

that daddy or I joined the Ku Klucking Klan.

China's too blame for Kung Influenza

and Hussein Obama was born in Kenya.
“Rule of Law”? For losers and fools.
A strongman rules using whatever tools.

I cudda slud down that ramp at the Point,

but it wudda been SAD if I fell

on account of my shiny slippery soul

and, well, since I’m goin' t' hell . . .

hell, truth to tell, 'swhere I belong

and when I take the country along

it'll be swell. In fact, on the level . . .

made a GREAT deal with my grandpa, the devil.