This stuff with Ukrainia
is really a painia
in my most ample butt.
BUT I am confident
all my close confidants
are gonna keep they're mouth shut
and not spill the beans
because that would mean
an end to my precedence
which would be disproportionate
and most unfortunate
and you'd be stuck with Mike Pence
who all agree
is worse than me
in addition to which he's a schnook.
Though I am a liar
who loves yelling “FIRE!”,
I am an adorable crook
whose crazy views
play well on FOX News —
I am very a-pre-ci-ated
by the old codgers
who hate draft dodgers
and think Meryl Streep's overrated.
The way that I see it
it makes great TV, in-
creasing cable news viewing.
CNN should be thankful,
I earn them a tankful
of loot 'coz I do what I'm doing.
Do not sound the alarm!
Nobody's been harmed.
Billionaires are doing fine.
Even George Soros
is joining the chorus
acknowledging I am divine
or if not a god
a guy with a wad
the world will not soon be shot of.
I may be vain,
a hurricane. . .
damage. . .I've done a lot of.
But I am here
so everyone cheer.
I tell you it's going greatly.
Please I beg, trust me.
Please do not bust me.
Have I ever lied to you lately?