Monday, May 25, 2020

№ 863: Donnie's ME-morial Day, 2020




On Sunday, the Times (to make me look bad)
listed names of the dead. (So they said.)
But how do I know they’re actually dead?
Where are their long-form certificates?
Did they ALL die of Covid-19?
Why must the Times (which I’ve never read)
always treat me so nasty and mean?
Couldn’t they once (or twice?) say something nice?
Who said I want (or need) their bad “advice”?


Instead of the “dead” on the front page
how about me on the driving range
drilling a perfect shot off the tee
to celebrate Memorial Day?
That’s the front page I want to see.