Wednesday, June 10, 2020

№ 875.2: EXTRA! RNC Policy Statement


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(with apologies to Gary Klein and Henry Hoffman)

TOP SECRET RNC HUNKER BUNKER (June 10)


We wanna be Donnie's whore
We wanna be Donnie's whore
We're no longer Lincoln's GOP
Because when we're Donnie's whore
we mean REALLY Donnie's whore
we'll repeal the whole last century

People ask, “GOP?
what do you wanna be,
now you don't got a soul anymore?
We know just what to say
We answer right away
There's just one thing
we're wishing for

We wanna be Donnie's whore
We wanna be Donnie's whore
We're no longer Lincoln's GOP
Because when we're Donnie's whore
we mean REALLY Donnie's whore
we'll repeal the whole last century

With Mitch we plot and plan
maybe we'll bomb Iran
and we'll outlaw all things not white
and it the schools we'll pray
everything gay away
make everyone say they're straight alt-right

We wanna be Donnie's whore
We wanna be Donnie's whore
We're no longer Lincoln's GOP
Because when we're Donnie's whore
we mean REALLY Donnie's whore
we'll repeal the whole last century