Thursday, September 6, 2018

№ 416.1: EXTRA! Sparrow Us

WSJ: Senior White House Officials Deny Writing Anonymous Op-Ed Piece (Paywall)

Top officials including vice president and secretary of state disavow anonymous New York Times column describing internal effort to contain President Trump

(with apologies to Simon and Garfunkel)


Who would write op-ed anonymously?
To criticize my presidency?
“Not I,” said Mike Pence,
“in no happenstence
would I be that dense
but then, yes, of course,
as history takes, its course. . .”

Who anonymously
would care to dare to criticize me?
“Not I,” said Pompeo,
“I would never fillet-o,
for what it's worth,
your enormous girth.
Upon my word. It is absurd.”

Who, for a negotiated fee,
will soothe and comfort me?
“Not I,” said the porn star.
"Take your NDA and shove it far
into the place where your brains are.”

Who will save poor little Don?
Somebody, soon, or I'll be gone.
“I will,” said Mueller.
“You overwrought, over-aged pathetic preschooler.
I will be far, far, far less crueler.”



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